Hard Providence

Everyday is a gift. That is something I truly believe. That each day is a beautifully crafted, scripted by God story. That whatever happens, is ordained by my God. It is so easy to say, believe and rest in that on sunny days. Most of my days are sunny. I have my season of dark days, but the sun still shines. Yet, as a pastor's daughter, I have people all around me who suffer daily. My dear friend, she might as well be my little sister, suffers from juvenile diabetes. I don't know what it's like to never have normal blood sugar, to always have to test and give myself insulin before I eat. There are two families in my church who have children with disabilities. For one family, it's having to make decisions that hold their child's life in the balance. For the other it's having a four year old who can't walk and a home with stairs. I don't know what this is like. On Sunday I hug them, get down and talk to the kids, but other than constant prayer this is all I can do. These parents daily trust in God's hard providence, in His divine care and love. He wrote these children's lives' this way because he loves them. It's a hard thing for man to swallow. Yet, God is God and we are not. We can only see a part of the story that He is and has written. God has written each of us our own stories, He has connected some stories, and not others. Though I may not understand why God has written some parts of the story the way He has, I will trust in His story. And if you step back and look at the story He has told so far, you will see what a masterful story it is. And right at the center of this master story is our Saviour, on a cross for us and His resurrection, His promise of our resurrection. His promise that because of His love and sacrifice, our story will never end. That our story goes on into eternity, eternal joy and communion with Him and one another. That one day my friend won't have juvenile diabetes. That the children in my church will be healthy. One will run and the other will be without pain. Providence may be hard on this pre resurrection journey. Yet, our story does not end here. In light of this, here is a poem on providence. 

Providence

From the beginning of and before time

my story has been written

its all scripted with it’s rhyme 

and cannot be unwritten

I am here not by happenstance 

or the whims of circumstance 

but the intention of providence,

ordained by God not by consequence

the first  of my breath

and my last in death

the first steps I take

the first mistake I make

Do not happen by happenstance

or the whims of circumstance

but the intention of providence,

ordained by God not by consequence